We got a saying in turkish,
“Somagizli”,
Means somebody, when he says something good, the opposite happens...
The other non-writer of this page, Topo is such a person....
All these happened in the last 4 months...
Topo:
“Why don’t you install Win 2000? Your PC is quite good and fast”
In the same week, when I tried to change my harddisk, everything collapsed, and boom.. Format.. Install 2000, reboot crash.. reboot crash... format.. Install 2000, reboot, crash, format, install 2000, reboot, works, connect to net.. 20 seconds.. kicked out of net.. system virus.. virus scan.. no virus found.. pc extra slow, format... install me.. reboot.. no boot.. format.. install me, reboot.. boot.. oh.. ok.. do not touch, it is working now...
“Hey, you tv-card works fine”
A few days later, am in the internet, want to watch the news,
Double click TerraTv,
Screen goes blank,
Counting memory....
Rebooted,
Try TerraTV,
Screen go blank,
Checking memory...
Problem not solved until now...
“Seems like your battery is ok this year”
Said on friday, on monday morning, the car goes,
iiy iiy iiy i i i zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
no wromm wrommm.. just click click
“You know you have an old car, but you were lucky no major problems”
That friday I paid 300 euros to get my fuel tank changed... Was leaking...
“Man, you never get sick.. You are like a pig.. Nothing affects you...”
Was said this weekend, and now I am on the verge of a flu, trying to stop it by Carmolis, Echina Force, special teas, ultra rare syrup, and original honey...
whenever,
“Hah, so you have had some good time with women this week, huh?”
No get laid for me, for some weeks...
So,
In the end,
There is one thing to say,
Topo,
....
SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!
Tuesday, December 23, 2003
Repeatability
Well well...
This girl is the main actor in the "href="http://yazi/iwant.html"
target="blank">I want sex" story,
....
After a year or so, go to NiteLife, for a change...
Enter, make a round,
Oh, here she is..
"Hello"
"Hi"
So we start talking,
She has always been a flaky girl, so I act accordingly, posture and
conversation wise...
Once she told me she had something to tell me, and then literally ran
away, so I found her, and she said she could not tell me 'cause she is
kind of seeing someone...
Once I met her outside of Lanotte, me out of Doris, she out of Groove,
3 minute get horny talk, and then a hug, all these in front an old
story of mine, who was going shagging with a pizza guy I know...
Once I even broke my rule, and went on a date with her... Had fun in
the conversation, because I was not in the date mood usually guys
are...
She went to London, so I asked her if she could please get a book for
me, and in the four days she was in london, she did not have time to
enter the bookstore, ask for the book, pay for it and come out..
Unbelievable...
Back to nitelife,
She sitting with back to bar, I am standing, talking, looking around..
She,
"Can I ask you a favor"
"Of course"
"Can you get me a water?"
"..No..."
"No? But you asked me a favor"
"That is different, you see, there is a distance difference, here you
are closer to the bar, then I was not closer to London..."
"Please"
"No"
So she turns to the bar, and orders her water,
"Order one for me too"
"I will not pay for it"
"You order, I will..."
So we continue our chat, and then I tell her to go to my place.. She agrees...
I live in 15 minutes walk distance to the bar..
We go out..
She says, lets take a cab..
I say lets walk...
She shows me her shoes.. These new trendy strange shoes.. You know,
white shiny, pointed... Yack...
So I say, I will take a cab if she shares with me the fee..
She says she's broke, could I just pay for she...
I say no, I do not do that,
She says please, do it, I want a cab..
I see a possibility to pay off breaking a rule,
So we walk to the taxi cue...
The queue is damn long,
By the time we get a cab, we could walk way past home...
So we start walking..
Just near the Hamburger Kiosk by the railway station, she goes flaky...
But this time, I have no pity..
"I don't know... If I should come"
"Know or not, make it up fast, I am freezing"
"You know I am not comfortable..." – With me, that is... Me, who has
not attacked her... in the year we know eachother...
"OK, then we say goodbye and walk our ways"
"Aaa.. noo... in england... my boyfriend.. tried to rape me.. have not
come over that... "
In my ear, I have heard bla bla bla.. Beeeeeeeeeecause it is -5, and
this is sooooooooo predictable... It is not sincere... and to add, I
have been with girls who have been raped before I met them, and I have
seen it is not easy to get over it... But this is different..
"That is bad, sorry for that, but in this cold, I am not a good listener.."
"You do not understand what it means"
"I do, I try to understand, but have no intention on freeing my ass
here, while you take the time to make up your mind"
We end up, me saying,
"I see you will not be coming, so let's say goodnite and go our ways"
"OK"
So she hugs me, my hands in my leather jacket..
"Oh come on give me a hug"
I take one hand out of my jacket and wrap it around her, her head on
my chest, my other hand in my jacket...
Here I have to note that, eight days after that, I met a girl,
incredibly sexy, stunning eyes, and clever, damn clever, with who I
walked for twenty minutes, in a snow storm, hand in hand, me without
glove... When we made it to her place, my hand was swollen from the
cold, did not respond to my "move you mamashagger.... move" command,
and that was still so nice..
To this girl, my hands preferred to stay in...
then she looks up, and says with a cutie face,
"A goodnite kiss??" Makes a move, I back off,
"No..."
"C'mon..."
"No, and then I have tasted you before, and you know my taste..."
And leave..
Decide to write an article about Rape and Me... And think about it all
the way...
Next week , friday,
4.00 AM, walking home, same route as always..
Pass by the Kiosk,
I see a couple on the corner...
The girl with her back to me...
Funny boots, and funny socks..
and I go, no this cannot be..
I realize the smirky smile on my face, from one ear to the other,
And the guy sees me, his face changes, what is this guy looking at me look,
I just come near them,
Turn my head, and oh helloouuuuuuu
"So, you pull the same trick on everybody you meet??" Cheaaaazzzzeeeee
She looks up, and shit-i-got-cought face,
"Oh shit!!"
This girl is the main actor in the "
target="blank">I want sex" story,
....
After a year or so, go to NiteLife, for a change...
Enter, make a round,
Oh, here she is..
"Hello"
"Hi"
So we start talking,
She has always been a flaky girl, so I act accordingly, posture and
conversation wise...
Once she told me she had something to tell me, and then literally ran
away, so I found her, and she said she could not tell me 'cause she is
kind of seeing someone...
Once I met her outside of Lanotte, me out of Doris, she out of Groove,
3 minute get horny talk, and then a hug, all these in front an old
story of mine, who was going shagging with a pizza guy I know...
Once I even broke my rule, and went on a date with her... Had fun in
the conversation, because I was not in the date mood usually guys
are...
She went to London, so I asked her if she could please get a book for
me, and in the four days she was in london, she did not have time to
enter the bookstore, ask for the book, pay for it and come out..
Unbelievable...
Back to nitelife,
She sitting with back to bar, I am standing, talking, looking around..
She,
"Can I ask you a favor"
"Of course"
"Can you get me a water?"
"..No..."
"No? But you asked me a favor"
"That is different, you see, there is a distance difference, here you
are closer to the bar, then I was not closer to London..."
"Please"
"No"
So she turns to the bar, and orders her water,
"Order one for me too"
"I will not pay for it"
"You order, I will..."
So we continue our chat, and then I tell her to go to my place.. She agrees...
I live in 15 minutes walk distance to the bar..
We go out..
She says, lets take a cab..
I say lets walk...
She shows me her shoes.. These new trendy strange shoes.. You know,
white shiny, pointed... Yack...
So I say, I will take a cab if she shares with me the fee..
She says she's broke, could I just pay for she...
I say no, I do not do that,
She says please, do it, I want a cab..
I see a possibility to pay off breaking a rule,
So we walk to the taxi cue...
The queue is damn long,
By the time we get a cab, we could walk way past home...
So we start walking..
Just near the Hamburger Kiosk by the railway station, she goes flaky...
But this time, I have no pity..
"I don't know... If I should come"
"Know or not, make it up fast, I am freezing"
"You know I am not comfortable..." – With me, that is... Me, who has
not attacked her... in the year we know eachother...
"OK, then we say goodbye and walk our ways"
"Aaa.. noo... in england... my boyfriend.. tried to rape me.. have not
come over that... "
In my ear, I have heard bla bla bla.. Beeeeeeeeeecause it is -5, and
this is sooooooooo predictable... It is not sincere... and to add, I
have been with girls who have been raped before I met them, and I have
seen it is not easy to get over it... But this is different..
"That is bad, sorry for that, but in this cold, I am not a good listener.."
"You do not understand what it means"
"I do, I try to understand, but have no intention on freeing my ass
here, while you take the time to make up your mind"
We end up, me saying,
"I see you will not be coming, so let's say goodnite and go our ways"
"OK"
So she hugs me, my hands in my leather jacket..
"Oh come on give me a hug"
I take one hand out of my jacket and wrap it around her, her head on
my chest, my other hand in my jacket...
Here I have to note that, eight days after that, I met a girl,
incredibly sexy, stunning eyes, and clever, damn clever, with who I
walked for twenty minutes, in a snow storm, hand in hand, me without
glove... When we made it to her place, my hand was swollen from the
cold, did not respond to my "move you mamashagger.... move" command,
and that was still so nice..
To this girl, my hands preferred to stay in...
then she looks up, and says with a cutie face,
"A goodnite kiss??" Makes a move, I back off,
"No..."
"C'mon..."
"No, and then I have tasted you before, and you know my taste..."
And leave..
Decide to write an article about Rape and Me... And think about it all
the way...
Next week , friday,
4.00 AM, walking home, same route as always..
Pass by the Kiosk,
I see a couple on the corner...
The girl with her back to me...
Funny boots, and funny socks..
and I go, no this cannot be..
I realize the smirky smile on my face, from one ear to the other,
And the guy sees me, his face changes, what is this guy looking at me look,
I just come near them,
Turn my head, and oh helloouuuuuuu
"So, you pull the same trick on everybody you meet??" Cheaaaazzzzeeeee
She looks up, and shit-i-got-cought face,
"Oh shit!!"
Friday, December 19, 2003
What about me?
The Catdevil girl,
After the cat incident,
In her bed,
Almost morning,
Hardly got it up...
2 minutes..
5 minutes..
10 minutes..
Still going,
She goes aaah, turns to me, and,
“I came, now I sleep”
and ... me? .... me?
Jingle balls jingle balls jingle all the waay,
Oh blue balls will kill me the morning next day..
After the cat incident,
In her bed,
Almost morning,
Hardly got it up...
2 minutes..
5 minutes..
10 minutes..
Still going,
She goes aaah, turns to me, and,
“I came, now I sleep”
and ... me? .... me?
Jingle balls jingle balls jingle all the waay,
Oh blue balls will kill me the morning next day..
Friday, December 12, 2003
Pope and red tanga
Ankara
1997
I think...
Am not sure..
The trunks as underwear are just emerging..
You can find fake Calvin’s in shops but their quality is miserable..
And I have to buy mine in Germany, but they do not last long..
A friend in the dorm has nice black ones.. Saw that while having a drinking session in his room..
“Where did you get these, man been looking for those all around town..”
“Carsi”
I to Carsi, and they have those.. Problem is...
....
They are red..
I think to myself, these are on sale now, cheap, I will buy these, and then can dye them black... That would do..
....
Sometime later..
When I have not done my laundry for some time,
My only underpants are the two red ones.. Of course was too lazy to dye them...
And I put them on...
Was going to meet my old flatmate, to get the cars to inspection..
Look out,
The workers are cleaning the stairs, it has been snowing for some days now..
Get out, and on the top marmor stair, I slip...
1... ah my ass
2... shit my ankle
3... I hope I do not break my last bone
4... heeeeelp
5... shit a long way to the bottom
6... paiiiin
7... end end
8... this must be the end
9... holy shit.. still 5 to go
10... if I will be able to sit?
11... ain’t it funny, time seems to slow down.. aaah
12... have I broken something? Hurts like hell
13... Fucking workers.. did nobody tell you that you cant wash the stairs in winter, -10??
14... Should’ve worn my gloves...
And am on the floor... Ass hurts, hands hurt.. can’t get up.. pain soaring through my body... Now that was a long way...
But gotta go...
Have to go to “Rot balance”, where they make your car go straight, and balance the tires, to let you have a smoother ride...
Go to the shop with Koray, and tell him what has happened, laughing my hurting butts off...
The kid in the shop, a kid educated by possibly the most man oriented education, who only has seen white slips as underwear..
A stupid smile on his face,
“Dude (Abi), your pants are ripped off...”
I turn my back to the car window and look at it...
There it is,
Half of my pants left side has been ripped open, and my red panties are smiling at me....
I felt like the pope...
A pope in red leather tangas...
1997
I think...
Am not sure..
The trunks as underwear are just emerging..
You can find fake Calvin’s in shops but their quality is miserable..
And I have to buy mine in Germany, but they do not last long..
A friend in the dorm has nice black ones.. Saw that while having a drinking session in his room..
“Where did you get these, man been looking for those all around town..”
“Carsi”
I to Carsi, and they have those.. Problem is...
....
They are red..
I think to myself, these are on sale now, cheap, I will buy these, and then can dye them black... That would do..
....
Sometime later..
When I have not done my laundry for some time,
My only underpants are the two red ones.. Of course was too lazy to dye them...
And I put them on...
Was going to meet my old flatmate, to get the cars to inspection..
Look out,
The workers are cleaning the stairs, it has been snowing for some days now..
Get out, and on the top marmor stair, I slip...
1... ah my ass
2... shit my ankle
3... I hope I do not break my last bone
4... heeeeelp
5... shit a long way to the bottom
6... paiiiin
7... end end
8... this must be the end
9... holy shit.. still 5 to go
10... if I will be able to sit?
11... ain’t it funny, time seems to slow down.. aaah
12... have I broken something? Hurts like hell
13... Fucking workers.. did nobody tell you that you cant wash the stairs in winter, -10??
14... Should’ve worn my gloves...
And am on the floor... Ass hurts, hands hurt.. can’t get up.. pain soaring through my body... Now that was a long way...
But gotta go...
Have to go to “Rot balance”, where they make your car go straight, and balance the tires, to let you have a smoother ride...
Go to the shop with Koray, and tell him what has happened, laughing my hurting butts off...
The kid in the shop, a kid educated by possibly the most man oriented education, who only has seen white slips as underwear..
A stupid smile on his face,
“Dude (Abi), your pants are ripped off...”
I turn my back to the car window and look at it...
There it is,
Half of my pants left side has been ripped open, and my red panties are smiling at me....
I felt like the pope...
A pope in red leather tangas...
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